The Creative Process in Midlife: Why Success in Your Next Chapter Requires a Descent into the Deep

If you are a woman in your 40s or 50s, you might have been experiencing midlife as a period bringing in a host of unsettling frictions. (I can definitely raise my hand on that one.) It's the kind of conflict that sets in after spending decades fulfilling roles (daughter, mother, partner, professional ___ (fill in the gap)), operating from the compliant, ever-churning, adulting world.

Something happens that makes you realise you can't continue operating in the same way. As an artist, my context might not be the same as yours, but I also know what it is like to play in the field of normality with logic, pleasing others, checking boxes, and living up to others' expectations of us.

We don't necessarily go out into the world seeking others' approval, at least not consciously, but somehow it has defined our style of reaction, our attachment to certain situations, and the way we present to others: the "masks" we now wear.

It started with being the "good girl" to gain Daddy's or Mummy's love, then how we fit into our teenage friendship groups, the way we navigated relationships thereafter, how we sold ourselves in the interview, and stepping into the major roles in our lives to act the way society expected us to. All fine in the race to acquire the success that everyone pointed to as the ultimate goal, with the promise that once you got there, you would be fulfilled, happy and whole.

But the reality at the top is not quite what we were sold, because in that race we kept sacrificing and trading the bits and pieces of ourselves that made us who we authentically were.

• The problem is in the mask (the mask we called Identity)

When you find yourself fully invested in the roles you worked so hard for, you risk starting to identify solely with the persona you had to embody to fit the part. So when the elite job is lost, the body and energy are not the same, the social status changes, or the kids are gone, your sense of self loses its floor, and you start perceiving the unsettling chasm between who you thought you were and the opportunities in a now-uncertain future.

To bridge the gap successfully, you need to anchor your sense of self elsewhere.

• Descend into the deep

To become the true author of your next chapter, you start by becoming aware of how your environment has heavily influenced your choices in life. Consciously decide to take control of the new narrative. You flip the dynamic by reconnecting with and redefining who you are from the inside out, and when I say from the inside, I mean from as deep as the subconscious.

In that depth you will find the parts of you lost in past races to fit, to succeed, to please: the authentic self that could not be brought along all those times before, yet today holds the key to your rise to wholeness.

The journey into the subconscious is a necessary one in order to untangle what's yours from the noise of ideas and beliefs that were never yours in the first place, but that are still causing dissonance and suffering every time there's change or a pressing need to leap.

The subconscious is also the well where artists "play" intuitively. Developing the capacity to bypass the logical mind, exercising the power of uncompromised choice, accessing hidden emotions, letting deep inner truths surface judgement-free and reflecting back, are all everyday essentials of the creative process, with the subconscious as its source in the quest for novelty, originality and authenticity.

• The Creative Process is the link

Mirroring the creative process, stepping into your deep reservoir to unlock your next chapter means:

1. Silencing the Censor: Recognise the censor and point it out to differentiate it from your own voice. Stop asking it for permission to want what you want.
2. Trusting the Inner Strategy: Reconnect with your body and learn how to listen to the language of your intuition through it. Rely on your gut feelings as faster, sharper data than your anxiety.
3. Reclaiming the Buried Pieces: Process your hidden emotions and reveal your deeper truths through observation, acknowledgement, release and reflection. Allow your dormant passions back to the surface.